It is impossible raise a child vegan.

Someone recently asked me about this story from 2006. Anne and I revisited the story; rarely is justice so quickly and so beautifully doled out! (End of the story; excerpted from Day 21 Concluded in Losing.)  

In late November 2006, Peter [Singer] invited me to Princeton to speak on a panel with Jonathan Haidt, the author of The Happiness Hypothesis. Jonathan's thesis that evening was, “Why Good Intentions Don’t Lead to Good Actions.” My talk was titled, “Causing Good Actions Anyway.”

Anne was at a big teaching conference, so EK, who was in seventh grade at the time, came along to New Jersey, handing out copies of “A Meaningful Life” to the crowd.

In his presentation, Jonathan said that whenever he spent time with Peter, he would decide to go vegetarian. Then when he would get home, he would slowly fall back into his old ways. (He showed a slide where his face slowly migrated from a picture of Peter over to a burger.) Of course, this is a typical story, given that the vast majority of people who give up meat revert back.

To give a sense of the stakes, my talk began with a short film about the conditions on factory farms. Then I pivoted to how food tech could help us overcome people’s inertia. If we could give people the burgers and the nuggets they wanted without killing animals, then good intentions would be enough.

(Producing meat without animals was an idea JL had told us about when he lived in our basement. [We let him out for meals.] In 2004, he started actively promoting the idea of cultivated meat – aka “clean meat” or, inaccurately, “lab meat” – actual animal cells grown in a clean manufacturing facility. That year, he founded New Harvest to promote research into cultivated meat. JL flew to Europe and convinced the Dutch Agriculture Minister to provide funding for research.)

The author Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close, Eating Animals) was in the Princeton audience for my talk, and he came to the dinner afterwards. That is also where I met the great Bob Wright in person.

The dinner, however, was a mess. It was as though the cook had heard my talk about giving people tasty animal-free food and said, “Hold my beer and watch this.” The main course was a slab of barely warm tofu with a slight drizzle of sauce. It could not have made vegetarian food look worse. I’m serious.

Sitting across from me was a grad student. She started holding forth on how her mom was a dietitian and had proven that while adults could be vegan, it was impossible to raise a child vegan. She went on and on, digging herself in deeper and deeper.

When she stopped, Peter, at the head of the table, nodded to his right and calmly said, “I think we should let [lifelong vegan] EK handle this one.” 

Beautiful.

Hahahahahahahaha

We are not unique flowers

I saw a story in a major news source about "how bad it is for kids these days." The father had graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and had a successful career. Daughter graduated and is living at home, looking for a job in ... social media.

Ummmm.... Chemical engineer ... social media ... one of these things is not like the other....

(See excerpt below graphics)

The difference between unemployment rates between young people and all workers is lower than the long-term average.

From "More Unpopular Opinions" in LMR:

Passion, love, and/or dedication are not enough.

When you commit yourself entirely to the pursuit of something, that produces excellence, and that is intoxicating for people who want to be close to excellence.

–Jane Friedman, The Business of Being a Writer

Sorry, Jane [who I really like], this is simply not true.

Same for Steve Jobs’ (in)famous 2005 commencement speech at Stanford: “Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.” 

Blargle. 

OK, fine, you got me – this is probably not horrible advice for graduates of Stanford. They not only have a Stanford degree, but to even get in, they must have had both a privileged life with connections in addition to their vastly above-average talents.

But for the vast majority of the tens of millions of people who watched the speech on YouTube, following “your heart and intuition” is a path to disappointment and/or your mother’s basement. For every Steve Jobs or Serena Williams or David Sedaris or RBG there are countless – Hundreds? Thousands? – of people who passionately dedicated themselves to something and failed.

Yet this shit advice is so common. It feels like everyone who succeeds thinks it is just because they wanted it more. Fish-man Michael Phelps was on Colbert saying anyone can be anything they want. Sorry, but no one without once-in-a-generation physical skills will ever out-swim Phelps. And there was no way Phelps could have then turned himself into a Tiger-beating golfer, or a Nobel-winning physicist, or a brilliant and insightful memoirist.

My life is a testament to this. In seventh, eighth, and ninth grades, I lived basketball. I ran, I lifted, I practiced before and after school. But as soon as other kids got close to my height, I wasn’t even good enough to play for a shitty school with a graduating class of 69.

And my passion to change the world, to reduce suffering? This book is testament to that failure as well.

I did meet my soulmate, but as is clear in this book, that was a lucky, unlikely accident, not as the result of passion or dedication.

Sunday Funny: Be Contagious

 

Weekend Reading

If you've read this blog for a while, you know I have increasingly become convinced that the climate doomers are a significant net negative in the world. (Example.) The Ecomodernist has another good example, following-up this excellent piece from August.

And a blast from the past (from here): The Impossible Burger Debate Was a Test for Vegans, and We Failed

I share these not to try to convince any of the Doomers or Vegans, but to make sure that people who seek to do actual good in the world aren't sucked into the narrative. When I posted this, one of the replies was, basically, "Climate change is going to kill us all!" <sigh>

For laughs. When I sent this to our friend in Auckland, they wrote back:
"You've been here the entire time??"  😆

You and I could be happier. It is simple but not easy.

It is not easy.

-Pet Shop Boys, "Happiness is an Option"

Ultimately, happiness comes down to choosing between the discomfort of becoming aware of your mental afflictions and the discomfort of being ruled by them.

–Robert Wright, Why Buddhism is True, quoted p. 215 here

I have written over and over about the Cult of Doom that has taken over the minds of many left-leaning individuals.

Also, I've written extensively (quoting Robert Wright) how evolution has left us with inherent nature that makes it exceedingly difficult to be happy. Any creature who was content was competed out of the gene pool; driven, uptight, and envious individuals tended to pass on their genes. In the dangerous world of our far ancestors, seeing threats everywhere was, sadly, a winning genetic strategy.

Now, "the best minds of my generation" spend their lives perfecting algorithms that manipulate our evolutionary heritage to optimally demand our attention. Anger, outrage, and tribalism gobble up our eyeballs.

We can intellectually recognize this, yet it is exceedingly hard to escape it. Even if we logically know the world is so much better, when the vast majority of "our side" are posting Doom Dogma, we simply can't help but emotionally absorb this worldview.

This comes to mind when Hank Green quotes a Leftie's tweet, "Although there are problems in the third world, at least they eat real food." [OMFG]

Or when Vox's article on the recovery of the green sea turtle is about how "scientists are worried." 

Or in Vox's "Good News," the author whines that people shouldn't need Ozempic, just diet and exercise. (Just like people with mental illness just need to "toughen up.") (Generally, however, the "Good News" is pretty good; example.)

I could go on, but if you doubt that the "news" and "social" media are constant drumbeats of negativity ... well, either "What?" or "Congratulations!"

The prescription, I believe, is clear: 

Diet and exercise.

Just kidding! 

It is actually harder than diet and exercise. We have to log off from the news and get out from under the algorithms. 

If you are trying to lose weight, you wouldn't let a stream of donuts and chips flow into your house. If you were fighting a a chemical addiction, you wouldn't sit in front of a plate of cocaine for hours a day. 

As I've written elsewhere:

Taking in horror after horror doesn’t make you a good person. Making a difference makes you a good person.

Choose where you can make a difference. You don’t need to know everything. You don’t need to read or watch everything. As Nobel Laureate (and one of Anne’s colleagues at Carnegie Mellon) Herb Simon said: “[A] wealth of information creates a poverty of attention.” (Quoted in our fellow Illini Nick Offerman’s Gumption.)

Relatedly, as Matthew Yglesias said, “One shouldn’t be complacent about the problems in the world, but one should avoid frustration about them.” (Offered even though you should never trust anyone named Matt.)

You don’t need to be depressed. You don’t deserve to be depressed. You can be happy and still make a difference. Indeed, I would contend that being happy makes it easier to make a difference over the long haul – both in your ability to work constructively and in the example you set for others.

PSA: Crawling Is Better Than Dying

As I've said before, I've two bad falls. In the past year, two younger friends (who are both in the book and know my stories of falling) have fallen and suffered bad injuries (although neither of them ended up in the hospital). Also, a not-old person with one degree of separation fell and actually died. 

Last week, I had a bad reaction to a vaccine, and was in great pain, light-headed, and nauseous. So when I was getting around at night, I crawled to keep from falling. Was it "dignified"? Who cares? Discretion is the better part of valor.

Be careful.

Warning: News. In Memorium

What a world that we ended up on the same side. Crazy.

REM's song about him.

If you are following the news

This report by John Oliver is good.  

If you are smart and not following the news, this is insightful on several levels:

Forever Winning!

Article recommendation: Paul Bloom's Are women unsuited for the pursuit of truth? My comment: "The problem seems to be the assumption that the pursuit of 'truth' is what matters. Why would that be? Why not reducing suffering? Why not increasing human flourishing? (Or flourishing for all sentient individuals.)

"Personally, I think 'the pursuit of truth' is a cop-out to let people off the hook for actually making the world a better place."

These palm trees burned several years ago (see the blackened trunks) but have come back!

As a follow-up to this, is the below something you've seen in SuzieVegan's feed or JamieV's substack:

That [vegetarian] movement has during the last ten years advanced more and more rapidly. More and more books and periodicals on this subject appear every year; one meets more and more people who have given up meat; and abroad, especially Germany, England, and America, the number of vegetarian hotels and restaurants increases year by year.

This sentiment has been expressed consistently (including by me) during my almost 40 years since giving up meat. But this particular quote is from Leo Tolstoy's First Step, published in 1891.

Two bits (health and wealth and pigs)

 This has been making the rounds and it is pretty illuminating:

And a follow-up to this ("Broiler mortality has increased from 3.7% to 6% over the last 12 years") here is another hard fact showing that the industry does not treat animals "well"; from Inside Animal Ag:

Just skip. You don't want to read about someone else winning the lottery.

I am happier than the average person (and way happier than Matt 33+ years ago) in part because I have, for over 12,000 days, marveled at my unfathomably and entirely unreasonable good fortune in meeting Anne. 

It is human nature to acclimate to everything good (the hedonic treadmill), but October 1992 was, for me, like winning the lottery and being given proof of a personal loving god (who, for some reason, happens to hate most other sentient beings).  

I think this is the first picture I took of Anne, which was two days after we wed.

From you know where:

The truth, with love, is that the heart knows straightaway

–Hervé Le Tellier, The Anomaly

(Oct 16, 1992)

Because of weird scheduling issues – e.g., I was out of town a lot for an ecology class, and she was busy teaching and looking for jobs – Anne and I didn’t meet to “discuss outreach” until a Friday in mid-October. She came over to my place, which despite my efforts at cleaning and improving, was a poor-man’s bachelor pad that smelled of cat pee.

Maybe I cooked something, but neither of us remember. What I do remember is that we didn’t talk much about animals. We got right down to “outreach.” At one point, I leaned back and asked, “What do you want to do now?” She replied, “I’d like to give you a backrub.” “Oh,” I gushed. “Will you marry me?”

Let the record show that she just giggled. ...

This might be as good a spot as any to list some of the things we have in common: From a redneck, small-minded, cow-forsaken cowtown; easily high school valedictorian; raised Catholic (goes without saying by this point) and Catholic schools; male and female siblings; father a pharmacist, mother worked in the school system. 

...

Sunday, October 18, Anne went out for a run and stopped by my place. As she told me later, she was doubting that things could really have been what they seemed to be. (Before we met, she had decided she was never going to marry and made peace with it.) By the time she left to continue her run, she was certain she was falling in love. (As was I! Wheeeeeeeee!)

The next Students for Animal Rights meeting was Wednesday the 21st. She came over before, and on the famous futon, we were sorely tempted to … just skip the meeting. But we pulled back. ... That Thursday night, October 22 1992, was the last night we willingly spent apart.

We were scheduled to go to a concert by Ellis Marsalis and Marcus Roberts on Friday [October] 23rd [1992]. Again on the famous futon, again terribly tempted to skip, but again we went, left early, and rushed back. That night is when we declared we were wed. And we began our life of sin.

(“Wed” being the commitment, “marriage” being a formal legal contract. I didn’t know this distinction until writing this book. We didn’t care about words; we just knew. October 23 is the primary date we celebrate, inasmuch as we celebrate anything.)

They say youth is wasted on the young. But yee-haw – for the next year, we took full advantage of our youth and vigor. It was Time the First: The first time my life was truly and completely wunderbar and I recognized and appreciated it as so.

This is neither rational nor objective

Autumn in Arizona

 To be an EA is to find out, again and again and again, that what you thought was the best thing to do was wrong. You think you know what [has the] highest impact, and you’re almost certainly seriously mistaken.  

–Kat Woods, “The most important lesson I learned after ten years in EA” (quoted in Losing My Religions)

Preface
I’m not accusing anyone of bad faith.

Everyone is just following their programming. More importantly, the people I “vilify” in this piece are trying to be good people. However, they are suffering from myopic arrogance that is making the world worse than it needs to be. I spent decades with the same affliction.

Frame
Last month, I spent time out-of-town with friends. My pneumothorax buddy told me how she had two groups of  friends / acquaintances. One was the group we were with at that moment – long-time animal advocates whose time together is filled with laughter, and who spend their professional lives trying to make things better at the margin. (Sometimes this involves simply trying to prevent regression.)

The other group are angry and judgmental “Vegans.” They spend their time saying how stupid, cruel, and hypocritical non-Vegans are. My buddy’s partner refuses to spend time with them.

Caveat

Like in nearly all online communities, I know that the loudest, most verbose voices in both the Effective Altruism (EA) and Vegan communities are not a representative sample. However, they wield enormous influence.

For example: Despite the delusions of the “We’re winning!” crowd, as I document in “The End of Veganism,” veganism hasn’t increased as a percentage of the population in basically forever. (It has actually gone down in recent years in the U.S.) This is because almost everyone who goes vegan goes back to eating meat:

Why? One survey of former vegans found that the top reason for quitting was that they couldn’t take the pressure to maintain the level of purity demanded by [the loud] Vegans. Vegans are “the greatest impediment” to the growth of veganism.

IOW, by constantly explaining why they are right, and everyone else is wrong wrong wrong, Vegans are not only failing to make things better – they are making things worse.

The Point Is This 

The problem … of all human “thinking” [is] we start with the end we want, and then work backwards.

We are rationalizing animals, not rational.

Any “ethics” we endorse first must … support our personal [subjective] desires.

Both Vegans and EAs recognize some of the cognitive flaws and biases and prejudices in others. In and of itself, this insight is great! But it leads many Vegans and EAs to believe that they are free of flaws and biases and prejudices. They are objective and rational and in possession of The One Truth.

The problem, of course, is that it is impossible to be truly objective and rational. We are all driven by emotions, desires, wants. Biases are inherent; religion is inevitable. 

Of course, the biggest problem with Effective Altruism is that utilitarianism itself is wrong. But the second biggest is that EAs think they are objective and can find The One Truth. (Meanwhile, Vegans are sure they have found The One Truth.)

The One Truth is, by definition, an illusion
In addition to the universal inability to be totally rational and objective, it is impossible to find The One Truth because anything that matters is inherently subjective.

The only thing that matters is subjective experience. “Subjective” is right there!

We don’t, and can’t, know what it is like to be a bat, a chicken, a shrimp, an 8-week-old fetus, a nematode, an amoeba, or an electron. And we can’t know how to compare a human suffering from crushing depression to a chimp in a deprivation cage (or to a pig in a gestation crate, or to a chicken starving to death because their leg broke beneath their unnatural weight).

And what do we do if we recognize our lack of knowledge and unconquerable uncertainty?

We just make shit up! And then prattle on and on about Bayesian statistics as if it is Objective Truth, when we are actually just pulling priors out of our asses!

How, exactly, do we choose which priors to pluck from our derriere? However we want.

Be suspicious of what you want. -Rumi
It’s not that we want to be “la la la la la happy.” Rather, evolution has left all of us, without exception, with a bunch specific wants:

• We want to think we’re smart (rational, unbiased) / have others think we’re smart, etc.

• We want to think we’re special / have others think we’re special.

• We want to think we’re important / impactful / will leave a legacy.

• We want to think we’re superior / have others admire us.

• We want to be validated.

• We want to be popular with certain people.

Almost never do we want only to make someone else’s life better.

So we just make stuff up so we can get what we want.

And then our “certainty” makes others’ lives worse.

Again: there is only subjective experience

I say all this because I’ve done everything discussed here. As I lay out in Losing My Religions, my professional career has, on net, made the world a worse place. And that was in large part because I wanted to think I was smart enough to find The One Truth.

But that was a delusion. There isn’t The One Truth. It isn’t Jesus, or Buddha, or Veganism, or Expected Value.

There is only individual subjective experience.

And what my long and often painful experience has shown is that, to a first approximation, what matters is reducing suffering.

To live a meaningful life, we don’t have to know The One Truth so we can make The Difference. We just need to make a difference.

The first step to making a difference is truly wanting to. And then recognizing and giving up our other inherent wants. Then we can actually help real, suffering individuals.

We don't have to choose the Doom perspective (aka Don't Read The Comments)

Hannah Ritchie recently blogged about the miracle of modern agriculture. In the comments, I thanked her for sharing straightforward facts. To which someone replied that their field in the UK was producing less hay than decades ago. 

Um, what? Talk about finding the cloud water droplet in the silver lining.

I'm sure UK Doom wouldn't have been happy if his yield was up but the graphs above were inverted.

The worst thing about the social internet is that it is an outrage machine. Anger, outrage, doom, hatred - they drive "engagement." Being online leads us to think that most people are utterly miserable. 

Being in the real world, though, doesn't support this.

And neither does looking at balanced, unbiased facts:

From here - worth a look.

I hope this blog can, on balance, make your life better. I don't expect to convince any Doomer or Vegan, but I would like others to realize there are other views.

Notes on Love, Luck, Bedbugs, etc.

Arizona autumnal color, north of Flagstaff

 1. In Losing, I say: “I have a simple definition of love: The happiness of a person I love is more important than my own.” I would like to amend that. For me, Anne’s happiness is my happiness. For me, there is nothing better than Anne experiencing happiness / pleasure / etc. That’s why I have literally dozens of pictures of Happy Anne around my office.

2. Don’t make your bed.

3. If you ever hike in new places, get the paid version of the AllTrails app.

If you can’t afford it, I’ll gift you a membership.

Get hiking poles. Even when travelling. Since we only ever fly with carry-on backpacks (and thus can’t bring poles with us) we buy (or borrow – TY N&J) a pair (we each use one). Then we give them away before we fly back. You’re welcome.

4. John Green (link) gives his own personal example of our “No Justice” world:

His comments about soccer mirror mine about basketball.

5. The “social” internet is a net bad. It is important to distinguish that from “the internet” (Wikipedia, AllTrails, every song you could ever want to hear, etc etc etc.)

6. My new friend Paul Ingram runs a very interesting project: PainScience.

He covers many fascinating topics, including the recent Belly fat and chronic pain. (Chronic pain will probably come up in a future post.)

7. If you’re in the mood for some philosophy about religion.

8. Finally, from you know where (just a smidge of all the amazing advice therein! ;-)

Don’t holler from the other room. Just don’t do it. Get up and go to them. You’ve been sitting too much as it is.

Also: Set and strictly follow the rule: You can’t answer a question with a question.

Also: Take everything your loved one says to you in the best possible way. If they really love you, they are probably saying it because they want you to be happy.

Too Good (Sunday Comic)

Maybe God meant to be benevolent: